


february, 1986; i want to see you,

by unnagi



Series: moonlight, rain, you. [5]
Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1980s, M/M, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 03:04:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17779385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unnagi/pseuds/unnagi
Summary: Kaminaga visits Miyoshi.





	february, 1986; i want to see you,

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ayam692001](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayam692001/gifts).



> i rly thought i ran out of things to write for kmmy but here we are again !! 3 days later !! i guess this is set about 3 months after the last fic~

**february, 1986; i want to see you,**

“Miyoshi, wake up,” I whispered to his ear, nudged his shoulder. He mumbled something in a soft voice, eyes still closed. “There’s a beautiful dawn…” I told him. “Do you want to see it?”

 

“I live here...” he said, turning to face the wall. “I can see it whenever I want.”

 

“Hm...Can’t argue with that.” 

 

So I went and watched the dawn from one of the windows by myself. The sky had begun to fill with light, and in this place light seemed to have its own tone, its own aroma - it was alive for sure, passing through the air in warm breaths and piercing streaks. Then below the light was its soul - the shadow, inseparable from its body. 

 

I opened Miyoshi’s fridge: a sad carton of eggs, milk, cheese, a bag of cherries and for some reason two slices of bread with black mold. “What do you wanna eat?” I called out to him. 

 

After thoughtful silence, “I want fish.” 

 

“Fish for breakfast? Really?” As far as I knew that wasn’t customary here. 

 

“No…just in general,” he said. 

 

At midday we went to an aquarium shop and watched the fish. The water became teal and warm under sunlight, while the ghosts swam with their translucent figures. For breakfast I had made him a sad omelette. Now the goldfish looked just like those sad egg yolks. The air was warm, filled with a dizzying light, sticky and tinted like raw egg whites. Why hasn’t it rained yet? I asked Miyoshi. We had left the shop and were walking through the streets. 

 

“The sky,” he said. “Looks as though Magritte had painted it.”

 

I looked up for a second, a lawn of blue sky and clouds with well defined edges. Now who the hell’s Magritte…

 

“How is your impression of Paris so far?” He asked me. 

 

All of a sudden I felt like I was being interviewed. I remained in limbo, trying to come up with an impression for Paris. Though I  _ am _ in Paris, I thought, how can you reflect on a moment that’s still in occurrence... “Quaint?” I said.  “Very Quaint.”

 

We went on to window-shopping for clothes, or Miyoshi was the one doing the browsing and I listened to his ramblings on each piece: here’s this designer, look at the fitting, the stitchwork, it shows once again that this and that is pioneering deconstructionism…Then in the afternoon we went to a photo exhibition he got invited to, it was called  _ The Dichotomy of Light and Shadow _ . Afterwards I decided it couldn’t be a real dichotomy, because light and shadow were the same thing...were they not? 

 

“I wonder about that too,” said Miyoshi. He took my arm and linked it to his own. “No matter, let’s go home.”

 

Home, for the time being was his “little flat on a sad, run-down street”, as he put it. We had gotten there and realised neither of us had much money left to buy groceries for dinner - him, having spent it on clothes and books last week while I was left penniless after booking a plane ticket to Japan. I searched his pantry - there wasn’t much...I guessed his busy schedule meant he skipped meals a lot. I found a bag of pasta and a dozen of candles, so I used them to the best of my ability: a candlelit dinner! In a show of amusement he teased me about the set up - everything has to be done romance’s sake, does it? 

 

“Why not,” I said. “You’ve got too many candles here anyway.”

 

“They were gifts,” he explained. 

 

“But you don’t have the time to indulge yourself these days?” 

 

“That’s right.” 

 

The winter sunset was early, although that time the sky was just full of desire, even the air breathed in red. For a few minutes our corner of the world had drowned in grenadine, and there he was, under its hazy, drunken light. I kissed him, or rather it was he who kissed me, with his light, his presence, his soul…

 

“You’re even more beautiful than the dawn this morning,” I told him with a grin. And without a word he had gently climbed onto my lap, wrapped his arms around my neck as I held his back, I saw a butterfly fluttering in the depth of his eyes as ours met. He lowered himself and drew our heads closer. I had felt the tip of his nose on mine, his quiet breaths melting into the air, and I had already missed him.

 

“How are you?”

 

“Well...I kind of just want to see you again,” I told him. He had called me the day after I arrived at Japan, where it was snowing. 

 

“You have too much time on your hands, don’t you?”

 

“What do you mean? All my time belongs to you.”

 

“Whatever,” he said, and I imagined he was doing some kind of a pout. 

 

More importantly, “Did you have lunch?”

 

“I will...after this.”

 

“Okay. I don’t want to keep you any l-”

 

“I want to see you too, Kaminaga.”

 

“Oh...well, we’ll see each other again soon, right? I promise.”

 

“Yeah,” he said. “It’s a promise. I have to go now though, can we talk tomorrow?”

 

“Sure...and don’t forget to eat.” 

 

“I won’t. Goodbye.”

 

“Bye,” I said. 

 

I found myself holding the receiver tightly in my hands, so I let it go. Feathery snow was falling outside, and I kind of had the urge to go for a walk. I waited for a while and headed out, going through the dimly lit streets, almost hypnotized by my own shadow. How great was it to have a shadow again - along with every other indicator of existence, or my assertion upon the transitory world...the night sky above me shone in a crisp, blue moonlight.   
  


**Author's Note:**

> its not even valentine's day in this fic n theyre already doing the Most oof... thanks for reading !!! :') and @ayam692001 i hope you liked it too~ <3 as always thanks for your kind words!


End file.
